Why is it so hard to deal with vegetarians and/or vegans?
Part of the problem is that vegetarians and vegans are often involved in activities, subcultures and/or communities that are traditionally viewed by the mainstream as, well, kind of fruity. Yoga, tai chi, meditation, reiki, acupuncture, etc.; all of these have a whiff (or a thick cloud) of what members of the Greatest Generation might call “hippie-dippy nonsense.”
And fair enough; in time, some of these practices will die out, while others will gain commonplace acceptance. It wasn’t so long ago that the idea of “jogging” was considered bizarre, and a gym was a class you had at school, or something that rich people and celebrities installed in their homes, next to their “Jacuzzi” (whatever that is, right?) and their fancy machines that made “cappuccino” and “latté” drinks out of the same beans real Americans use to make a cup of coffee.
So, yeah. Today’s yoga may wind up as yesterday’s scrotum piercing, or it may turn out to be yesterday’s tongue piercing. Time will tell.
But in general, a subculture or community tends to define the behavior associated with it—not literally, but in terms of external perception. So, even if someone practices yoga but eats meat every day, she’s still seen as a bit “new agey.” On the other hand, if a pro wrestler goes vegetarian, he’ll still be seen as a tough guy.
Taken a step further, the omnivorous yoga person will be “new-agey, but cool,” to her friends, and the wrestler will be “a tough guy who’s got a tender side.” The stereotypes of the primary set (new-age, toughness) are offset by positive traits (cool, tender).
On the other hand, if the yoga practitioner becomes vegan, her friends’ perception of her will (let’s be honest) become slightly less favorable. Why? A couple of reasons present themselves:
Implicit or perceived judgment:
The vegan yoga girl’s friends’ will assume that she’s quietly evaluating their dietary choices and, by extension, them, too.
Practicality:
New hassles relating to choosing/serving food, picking restaurants; also, “having That Conversation all the time.”
Not being in the club:
The vegan yoga girl’s doing something different that her friends aren’t a part of; she’s implicitly excluding them.
Vegan/vegetarian stereotypes:
Pretty much everyone can cite an annoying example set by some pain-in-the-ass grass-eater (with their snooty ‘tudes and whatever).
Now, this doesn’t mean she’ll lose all her friends, or that they’ll stop inviting her out, but her choice does represent a hurdle—however low—to get over for most people.
“Where will we meet up?”
“Oh, we have to make sure there’s a vegetarian option for Carrie.”
“Uh-uh, she’s vegan.”
“What? Oh, great. Let’s narrow it down even more. Is she macrobiotic? Should we just meet in the park for some leaves and pond water?”
On the other hand, if the vegan wrestler adds another piece of fruit to his, um, basket, what happens then? How far into the mystic does Rambo have to go before his masculinity is called into question; before his hippy-dippy nonsense officially outweighs his wrestler’s machismo and intimidating physique?
The point here, then, is to consider where the cross-sections exist between “vegans/vegetarians” and “cool people who are fun.”
Now, it’s important to note that this metric has to extend outward, not inward. That is, lots of vegans and vegetarians are cool and fun to be around—to other vegans and vegetarians. The same is true for omnivores. So where do the circles intersect? Where are the vegans who can just hang out and liven up the party, without commenting on the cold cuts on the table? Where are the omnivores who willingly go without meat—and without bellyaching—when they go out with their plant-eating friends?
We know these people are out there. It’s just that they’re still the minority; they have a tough time, because the rest of their circles (i.e., the parts that don’t intersect) are vegetable-obsessed fancypants or meat-defensive wisecrackers.
And, lastly—and this might be near the crux of this highly polarizing issue—where are the people on both sides who don’t feel implicitly, tacitly, silently yet fundamentally judged and/or disdained by their opposites?
The answers to these questions are in the works. (At least, they will be if you keep thinking about them. Look, I can’t do everything on this.)
P.E.D.A. 